Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Sweet Layla

My sweet friend, Layla, posted this on our "I am a WarriorGirl" yahoogroup. I just had to share
:-)

Dear Warrior Girls,

Thanks a lot. Thanks for taking my cozy, easy, half-convicted life, and turning it upside down. Thank you for allowing God to work through your lives in a way that has switched me from reading decorating blogs (and dreaming of billowy curtains, and glorious white dishes), and choking me with grim reality blogs. I really appreciate the way you took my shopping trips (*SIGH*) and made them seem so darn petty. Today I came home with a little pink bag of my favorite undies, and now all I can think of is how many bellies that price tag would have filled. Yeah, thanks for that. I would also like to thank you for introducing me to your children. Children that could have remained a mystery…unknown… Now my heart has been touched in places that I didn’t know existed. I sob over photos of these little ones, and the ones that peep through bars…waiting for their forever family. Yeah, thanks for that heartache. Now I cannot throw anything out without wondering how I EVER became so wasteful. I look at my stuff and wonder what my problem is. REALLY? Do I REALLY need another one of those? Great. Now I have more conviction…thanks. This is what I get for having a band of friends that care more than I knew was even possible. This is what I get for knowing a God that is SO BIG and AMAZING, that I have been smacked-down, face flat on the concrete. I have tripped on my own indifference. And you know what? I TRULY AM THANKFUL! I love you all so much. I wonder why God allows me to be in this group? I am SO stinking far behind where I should be! I don’t pray enough, care enough, give enough, try hard enough. I am so selfish that is nauseates me. Why on earth would God show me such mercy? There is so much mercy in pain and correction. My Father is so good. Yes, this letter started sarcastic and silly, but here is the cold hard truth: I want to know more. I want to hurt more, feel more, give more, break more. I need all of you to hold me accountable. I am not even close to making the cut. Thank you, Jesus, for your mercy and grace! I am nothing without the blood of Jesus covering my every sin. I needed (NEED) the reality and support that He has brought through all of you. I am forever grateful…even though I really liked billowy curtains and PINK undies. ;)

Your Warrior Sister,
Layla

***don't you just love her already?

4 comments:

Erin Moore said...

LOVE Her ...wait a second, is she me?

Seeing myself in the reflection of this post - for sure.

I'm behind on my WG emails, thanks for putting this one in front of me!

The Engelhardt 4 said...

I love Layla's heart. She speaks so eloquently what the rest of us (ME especially) have had a hard time putting into words. She totally hit the nail on the head with this post.

Layla Payton said...

AW, I didn't even see this the other day. I love you all SO MUCH! God has blessed me more than I could have ever imagined with these Warrior Sisters (Girls). Brandi, you are a daily inspiration to me.

Jessica Smith said...

Just had to say to Layla that I couldn't agree more! We all have different things that can draw our time and affections away from the Lord and from focusing our efforts to further His Kingdom (especially by warring for His precious ones)...and it is most definitely a promise. But this we do know...that God WILL finish the GOOD WORK that HE has begun in each of us because He loves us so much and desires for us to know and love Him! Blessings to you sweet sister!