I think that at this point I will always be missing something. When I am here, I miss Africa terribly. When I am there I miss my friends and family here. I'm trying to let this be a reminder of how my heart is meant to ache. We are never supposed to be comfortable and at ease, but longing for a life of fulfillmen
t that can only be found in Jesus when we get to heaven.
For now. . I feel ruined once again. Gloriously ruined for sure. I will never forget or regret the experience of entering if only for a moment the suffering of others. I will chose to remember their faces. It may make me an awkward American and force me to live between two worlds and the tension that causes, but I believe it's worth it. I can't pretend I haven't seen this. I used to calculate everything in $7 increments. . .what am I going to do now that I know we can feed someone a meal for $0.17 ? How do I justify that in my mind? How do I comprehend that we have been given much. . . .and we aren't sharing very well with our brothers and sisters? My heart aches.
Coming home isn't easy. . .I don't know where home is anymore. Thank you for all of you who DO make this feel like home and if you're reading this (Joseph). . .pass on all my thanks to those in Uganda who certainly made that feel like home too.
PS Keep checking back, I have many more Uganda posts coming in the next week or so. . .still processing a lot. I also have videos and photos I'm working on (since I'm up at 3:45 today)